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Real Life [by Morons] 9.921a

This bundle is marked as useful / simple. Simplicity is bliss, low effort and/or may contain minor bugs.
Real Life [by Morons]
MoronSonOfBoron's original Real Life [for Morons] which has been edited and updated [By Morons].

Map Description
Explore a chaotic city with 14 involving jobs, 13 properties, cops, crime, and more! Complete quests, appease terrorists, join the mafia, evade wandering murders, or just sit back and celebrate clover day. You can even age up from a teenager to an adult, get married, have a child, experience old age, or even die! (and live out a second life as your own child). Real life is what you make of it, but do make sure you shower every now and then! ;)

Map Creators
Original Real Life [for Morons] by: MoronSonOfBoron & Harken_Dell
Reworked Real Life [for Morons] edited by: GrandKaiser
Updated Real Life [by Morons] edited by: Memzak
(from the map Real Life [for Morons] 9.26 which this map was updated/edited from)

Credits
Full credit for the custom assets goes towards the amazing artists over at the Hive Workshop (below), you all rock!
!!GORO!!, 4eNNightmare, ~Nightmare, Afronight_76, amigurumi, bisnar13, Blood Raven, Blue Bay, c-row, Cavman, darkdeathknight, D.O.G., Elfsilver Lord, EviL_BuddhA, Fingolfin, FrIkY, Gar'nogal, General Frank, Golden-Drake, hashveen, Hayate, Heinvers, Hemske, HerrDave, Illidan(Evil)X, InfernalTater, infrenus, Ket, kola, MC!, Matarael, Mobilize, MortAr, Mr.Goblin, NFWar, Narandza, olofmoleman, RightField, SD_Ryoko, skrab, Stanakin, Sunchips, Sunchips, supertoinkz, Tenebrae, TheRandomDude, The_Silent, Thorneon, Trollschnitzel, yakonshus, ZethHolyblade, Zombie

Changelog
9.921a (17th August 2021)
Feature: Readded a WHOLE bunch of interact text that was removed for some reason.
Bugfix: Quiting while inside of the Street Cleaner no longer makes your Hero unusable.
Bugfix: Removed helpbook text talking about how the Church can't do same-sex marriage.
Bugfix: Added Line of Sight Blockers to the Meusum-Mansion wall.
Bugfix: Removed mention of the non-functional '-aquacam'.
Bugfix: Ghost attack type changed to Energy.
Did a lot of groundwork for a potential gun/weapon equipping overhaul.

9.921 (15th August 2021)
Feature: Reprotected the Map (private message me if you need an unprotected version)
Bugfix: Many miscellaneous things I had been putting off doing.
Bugfix: Actually uploaded the map to the internet.

9.919 (15th December 2019)
Reworked many models/icons to make things more cohesive (made a number of custom assets for the map).
Reworked every single trigger and squashed many, many, many bugs.
Reworked the entirety of how regions were handled in the backend.
Reworked how the traffic system functioned, to be (hopefully) less laggy.
Feature: Increased the player count to allow for a new maximum 20 players.
Feature: Increased functionality of AI... they chose heroes/names and run around randomly now.
Feature: Increased civilian unity, custom models for Women and Teenagers to better match the Men/Children models.
Feature: Increased civilian diversity, there are now five 'Man' variants and four 'Woman' variants (2 of which are lawyers/mafia).
Feature: Made the Mafia more interesting, and added a little more Mafia content. Reworked their reputation system.
Feature: Made same-sex marriage a valid possibility at the Church, as well as the mail-order-spouse mechanic.
Feature: Added a couple secret items/quests for players to discover...
Removed: Ability to pick race as well as the many slurs found in Dialogue text across the map.
Bugfix: 'Happenings' and 'Events' made distinct. (E.G. Clover-Day while the Night Stalker is still being hunted)
Bugfix: Weather events no longer target indoor areas nor units sheltered in garages.
Bugfix: Restored Anti-Cheating measures (possibly still non-functional).
Bugfix: Fixed the fishing mechanic such that it actually works.
Bugfix: Fixed farms to not CONSTANTLY generate new items.
Bugfix: Restored the CD Store seller.
Bugfix: Restored the Big Mafia Man.

9.918a
Non-protected version that was available at the time.
Largely incomplete and full of bugs.
Contents

Real Life [By Morons] 9.921a (Map)

Reviews
deepstrasz
No improvements until now. Substandard.
Level 5
Joined
Apr 10, 2008
Messages
37
Do you have permission from the authors to update and edit this map? Provide evidence that you tried to contact them.

Directly within the original version of the map file there was the text "This is an unprotected version of the map! STEAL TO YOUR HEART'S DESIRE!" which I took as permission to update/edit the map. The text should still be under the 'Stealing' heading in the F9 menu. If further evidence is still required I shall attempt to contact GrandKaiser on the abandoned Real Life [For Morons] forum.

I would like to see a couple of screenshots from the map

Sure, will grab some a little later today👍
 

deepstrasz

Map Reviewer
Level 69
Joined
Jun 4, 2009
Messages
18,806
Directly within the original version of the map file there was the text "This is an unprotected version of the map! STEAL TO YOUR HEART'S DESIRE!" which I took as permission to update/edit the map. The text should still be under the 'Stealing' heading in the F9 menu. If further evidence is still required I shall attempt to contact GrandKaiser on the abandoned Real Life [For Morons] forum.
If you can provide a link to an older version of the map that says that, it would be good. But the map version should be by the authors, not someone else.
 
Level 5
Joined
Apr 10, 2008
Messages
37
At this point I don't know what to say? I can provide a screenshot of the relevant triggers (from the original 9.26b map) but I don't know what to beyond that:
1629043887420.png

EDIT: I'm stupid. This was under the the '-help' section, in the dialogue box that appears when you type '-help'.
 
Last edited:

deepstrasz

Map Reviewer
Level 69
Joined
Jun 4, 2009
Messages
18,806
This was under the the '-help' section, in the dialogue box that appears when you type '-help'.
Right. Use the screenshot as evidence in the map thread description and also...

A credits list in the map description with the names of the authors whose resources you've used is mandatory. That includes models, skins, icons, custom spells, systems. Also, sounds, music and everything outside this site.
This helps you with the models, skins and icons from Hiveworkshop: Resources in use by Real Life [by Morons] 9.921

Awaiting Update.


If you want more reviews, you should participate in the The Grand Review Exchange!

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  • A credits list in the map thread description is required where the names of the resource (models, skins, icons, spells, sound etc.) authors are mentioned along with the specific resource. It would be a luxury to have links leading to the used resources. Credits in the Quest Log would be appreciated too.
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If you're not satisfied with the review and wish another opinion, contact the other reviewers or use the staff contact:
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deepstrasz

Map Reviewer
Level 69
Joined
Jun 4, 2009
Messages
18,806
is there anything else needed to get it approved?
Yes, a reviewer will have to test the map and see it works well and that is considerably different than other maps of the genre, like Life of a Peasant for instance.



  • There's a lot of text from various things that has no colour variation which becomes hard to read. Also, some text is related to quests and it isn't stored anywhere like in the quest log so you might not remember the whole thing. The colour emphasis should also be used on items for ingredients and such.
  • Abilities should be on QWERTY. It's annoying to use Interact. Either you press R and I or you use two clicks. Would be faster if things would be QWERTY based.
  • You don't get any message or gold coin text near your hero when you place the stockpiles in the crates at the docks.
  • Action and Get Excited have the same icon. Same Kow Patties and Porky Pig Loins.
Generally, the map could use some polish.
 
Last edited:
Level 5
Joined
Apr 10, 2008
Messages
37
Rightio, I can see your edit now, thank you for the message on my profile about it!

Are these things that need to be fixed immediately in order for it to be accepted or can I work on them in my own time as a future update? I've went ahead and touched up a couple of the things you mentioned on my copy of the map (namely icons and the Interact skill), but things like adding color variation for all text or some sort of universal +X gold text is going to take waaay longer than that.

If it's that subpar compared to The Hive's current standards please just let me know upfront and I'll take it down and settle for hosting it elsewhere. I don't really have time to become a fulltime mapmaker and make drastic changes (in a timely fashion at least) like I did when I initially made it, and mostly just wanted to share a more polished 20-player version of the map I very much enjoyed in years past.
 
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