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Joking Around

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aldo2000

aldo2000

aldo2000

Level 5
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Sep 30, 2011
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Hey, hey! I never post in off-topic before, I need you all to write and reply your greatest joke and pun ever!
Warning : Must be funny, don't insult other account, and don't insult me
 
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Really lame Stormwind puns:
I wouldn't mind getting into her royal chambers!
Who let you out, because I'm howling.
Did the holy bless you, because your giving me a royal seal off in my pants...
FOR THE GLORY....OH MY GOD YOU ARE SO DAMN SEXY!!!
 
Here's a joke:

A blonde, wanting to earn some money, decided to hire herself out as a handyman-type and started canvassing a wealthy neighborhood. She went to the front door of the first house and asked the owner if he had any jobs for her to do.

"Well, you can paint my porch. How much will you charge?"
The blonde said, "How about 50 dollars?" The man agreed and told her that the paint and ladders that she might need were in the garage. The man's wife, inside the house, heard the conversation and said to her husband, "Does she realize that the porch goes all the way around the house?"
The man replied, "She should. She was standing on the porch."

A short time later, the blonde came to the door to collect her money.
"You're finished already?" he asked. "Yes," the blonde answered, "and I had paint left over, so I gave it two coats. "Impressed, the man reached in his pocket for the $50. "And by the way," the blonde added, "that's not a Porch, it's a Ferrari."
Click to expand...

lmao
 
Here's a blonde joke...No offense to blondes though

So here it is:
3 blonde girls get stuck in the elevator...
And they started shouting: ,,HELP!!!HELP!!HELP!!!"
While one blonde said: ,,Hey!Let's shout simultaneously"
And then all the other blondes started to shout: ,,SIMULTANEOSLY!SIMULTANEOSLY!SIMULTANEOSLY!!!"

:P
 
Hello,

Magtheridon96 said:
I think the Joke is:

Why is 6 afraid of 7?
Because 7 ate 9.
Click to expand...

...Well, it makes more sense with "why's 9 afraid of 7?"

Fully spoiled:

Why's 9 afraid of 7?
Because 7 ate 9; Because 7 8 9 (seven eight nine).

It's kinda too abstract to explain why I prefer it this way...
 
Here's a joke:

schrodinger-equation.png


Oh Schrodinger, you crack me up.
 
well here is not a joke or pun, but interactive joke or pun (go figure) :
1. open up Google
2. type in "Top 50 women in the internet' or so
3. look at number 7
4. LoL (Laugh out loud)
Sorry if anyone here has bieber fever, *sigh* I say bieber fever and got a flu (SERIOUS)
 
okay there was this guy who dragged his girlfriend in a dark alley
GUY: watch out for passerby
removes pants*
GIRL: what? why? wait don't get too excited.
GUY:what you're gonna poop too???

also, there's this corny joke but anyway,


there was a weird contest about who poops the most would get a million bucks
a guy got a talisman that looks like a cross which gives you the powers to poop hundreds of buckets
but your fingers must touch the forehead first then your stomach.
the guy won the contest and threw the dangerous talisman
hours later,
a priest passingby picked up the talisman, attended the mass
and said:
"in the name of the father, and of the son..."
talisman activated*
 
An old joke.

3 guys are in front of the Guinness World records building, and they all intend to break a record. First guy thinks he has the smallest hands in the world: he gets in and gets the record for smallest hands. Second guy thinks he has the smallest feet in the world: he gets in and gets the record. Third guy thinks he has the smallest dick in the world: he gets in, then gets out and ask the two others, "ok, now who the hell is this Justin Bieber guy??!"
 
Hubcool said:
An old joke.

3 guys are in front of the Guinness World records building, and they all intend to break a record. First guy thinks he has the smallest hands in the world: he gets in and gets the record for smallest hands. Second guy thinks he has the smallest feet in the world: he gets in and gets the record. Third guy thinks he has the smallest dick in the world: he gets in, then gets out and ask the two others, "ok, now who the hell is this Justin Bieber guy??!"
Click to expand...

But, Beiber is a girl O.O
 
A guy walks into a bar, sits down, and pulls out a tiny piano out of his pocket. He then pulls out a tiny pianist out of his pocket and the pianist begins playing a tune. The bartender comes over and asks "How did you get that?" and the man responses "There's a genie outside."

The bartender runs outside, and sees the genie. He asks for a million bucks, and then a huge flock of ducks crashes down from the sky. The bartender runs back inside the bar and says "What's wrong with the genie?" The man responses, "I dunno, why would he think I'm asking for a 12 inch pianist?"
 
-Derp- said:
A guy walks into a bar, sits down, and pulls out a tiny piano out of his pocket. He then pulls out a tiny pianist out of his pocket and the pianist begins playing a tune. The bartender comes over and asks "How did you get that?" and the man responses "There's a genie outside."

The bartender runs outside, and sees the genie. He asks for a million bucks, and then a huge flock of ducks crashes down from the sky. The bartender runs back inside the bar and says "What's wrong with the genie?" The man responses, "I dunno, why would he think I'm asking for a 12 inch pianist?"
Click to expand...

lololol
 
Really lame Orgimmar quotes:
"Is your stronghand happy to see me, or its just me?"
"My orc blood will give you any desires that you want"
"LOK'TAR YOU ARE LIKE THE ELEMENTS!!!"
"You please me long time!"
"If I ever heard 'You are sexy mon' like a thousand times I would be a rich troll"
 
A chinese, american and a german sit in a pub, they argue about which wash machine can take the most damage.

They decide to prove it by throwing each of the countries wash machine's out of a flying plane.

Chinese throws first, wash machine destroyed.

American throws then, wash machine is destroyed.

German throws last, wash machine is not destroyed.

The other 2 ask the german how he did that:

The german answers with: "Wash machines live longer with calgon!"
 
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