Fix grammar please.

Level 3
Joined
Nov 22, 2012
Messages
50
Hello I'm making AOS map, and at the moment I was creating a story, but have a lot of mistakes I think :D(yes I used google translate for some words), if possible fix grammar mistakes. Thank you!

TEXT:

Once it was a quiet island where natives lived a peaceful life and everything was fine until a strange ship appeared. It was ship of evil. The evil was called forgotten. They are intelligent, strong, but very bad. They tried to enslave us, but however we oppose. Today after several years they do not want to give us peace of mind and still trying to enslave us, but we humans will not surrender until the last drop of blood.
 
Level 25
Joined
Jul 10, 2006
Messages
3,315
It was, at first, a quiet island where the natives lived a peaceful life. Nothing spectacular happened until the day a strange ship arrived. A ship of evil. A forgotten evil; intelligent and strong. We opposed their attempts to enslave us.
On this day, after several years of bloodshed, we humans are still fighting. And we shall not surrender until the very last breath of the very last warrior.
 
Level 14
Joined
Jul 12, 2011
Messages
1,383
Nice story!!!
I won't say about grammar stuff but commas.
Once, it was a quiet island, where natives lived a peaceful life and everything was fine, until a strange ship appeared. It was ship of evil. The evil was called forgotten. They are intelligent, strong, but very bad. They tried to enslave us, but however we oppose. Today, after several years, they do not want to give us peace of mind and still trying to enslave us, but we humans will not surrender until the last drop of blood.
Also there are some sentenses which I don't know what are you trying to say.
Like that one:
It was ship of evil. The evil was called forgotten.:eekani:
 
Level 3
Joined
Nov 22, 2012
Messages
50
It was, at first, a quiet island where the natives lived a peaceful life. Nothing spectacular happened until the day a strange ship arrived. A ship of evil. A forgotten evil; intelligent and strong. We opposed their attempts to enslave us.
On this day, after several years of bloodshed, we humans are still fighting. And we shall not surrender until the very last breath of the very last warrior.

Rulerofiron99 comes and amazing happens. Thanks forr fixing. I created this in 5 mins. Maybe you have idea how to implent the island name: Terra Nullius(land of none in latin) maybe evil named it somehow lol. Sorry for mistakes writing from my phone.
 
Level 3
Joined
Nov 22, 2012
Messages
50
Thanks. I will ask help for you, if something is going to be changed. Lol'd at you signature, but it's true. :D
 
Top