Garner's Quest

[Moderator]

01:50, 3rd Feb 2009 by bounty hunter2:
A interesting plot to a not so well made cinematic, with lacking terrain, cameras and fade filters. It has some strange twist offs aswell. However it will still entertain you, thus Approved with a 2/5 (Lacking) rating. You still need a lot of work on it to make it better.

You can find my new review Here.
You can find my old review Here.

 

[Thorneon]

my first uploaded map. I hope you guys enjoy!

 

[DredLord2]

Pretty good cinematic. The only thing I would change is make it a little more detailed, how did Garner and Nai've get captured?

 

[Day-Elven]

[+] It don't have a complexive storyline, but it's a funny cinematic =)
[+] It's original in comparison with other cinematics
[+] Nice landscape
[•] Why is it "created by Unknown"?

Overall: it's a very good cinematic [9/10]

 

[Thorneon]

i dont really know why its unkown. Oh and dredlord, maybe I will make a prologue.

 

[WONDERWOMAN]

Yes, it's funny, good job. But... i've a idea, you don't explain why Garner was captured, you may explain it in the second part, just a idea, is your map. When Garner and Nai've are liberated there is a bug in the moment they are near the prision doors.
This is my first reply, jaja, but i'm not a novice in the map development.
I joined Hive this mont but i will upload my newest map in a few days "Conquest of the Power"
Sorry if my english isn't correct

 

[Septimus]

1) The footman repeat the sentence "They went into the crypt. We might as well say they are dead. Alright boys, move out!"
2) Terrain could be better, at some senario it seems like the entire destructible/doodad been spam randomly across the map and try to reduce height variation; it seems like you set it pretty high at certain area while the other look rather smooth.
3) No fog effect, without fog effect; the edge of the map could be seen.

4) Knight unmounted from the horse and become bandit ? Come on, there is a custom model of knight that doesn't ride horse. Use that model instead of the bandit.
5) Invalid author name, breaking the rules of this site.
6) The victory condition should be set to skip dialog, skip scoreboard.

Overall rating was 2/5, but since it was breaking rules for having invalid author name. I have to give 1/5 at this moment.

Is this map approvable ? To be honest, the map quality is between the edge of decent and lacking at this moment. So I believe the best status for this map would be REVIEWED.

 

[Thorneon]

I dont know why it is unkwon, I'll try to reupload. As for the other things, thanks for the critique, I'll try to improve. the black spots you point out in the screenshot is the lowered cliffs where the spectators sit, I guess you cant really see them without looking at the editor, maybe ill pan across the crowd in an update.

 

[Avex]

I don't like the blue fire, it doesn't look good at all, and to agree with Septimus, create more good atmosphere, everything is just massed and theres no real.. terrain Variation.

 

[Day-Elven]

I dont know why it is unknown

Scenation --> Map description --> Author

 

[bounty hunter2]

Here is my rating and comment:

1 - 10 points go on originality
1 - 10 points go on object editor work
1 - 10 points go on scripting
1 - 10 points go on terrain
1 - 10 points go on bug free
1 - 10 points go on gameplay*/fun factor
1 - 10 points go on lag
1 - 10 points go on proper submission and crediting
-------------------------------------------------
That equals 80 points max.
-------------------------------------------------
+ Cinematic
1 - 10 points on camera work
1 - 10 points on dialog
1 - 10 points on music and or voice acting
- Cinematic
Object editor work
* Not in cinematic
-------------------------------------------------
->That equals 100 points max.
To get a Hive grade over 1/5 at least 50% of the 80 (Triggered map) or of the 100 (Cinematic map) points is needed. That means at least 40 or 50 points. However if a map gets rated over 1/5 by me, that doesn't mean that I will imidietly vote it to be approved.

Originality: 6 points
Interesting kick off, not that interesting characters thou.

Camera work: 3 points
Mostly bad static cameras, keep your cameras fluid all the time, it went through ground once.

Scripting: 5 points
Basic triggering that anyone could do, nothing special.

Terrain: 4 points
This wasn't much of a good terrain, too plain, boring, needs a lot more work.

Bug Free: 10 points
Runs fine.

Gameplay/Fun Factor: 4 points
Well the story was interesting, maybe to predictable, it wasn't fun to watch in most places, as the terrain was bad, dialog, cameras all need to improve for a better watch.

Lag: 10 points
Fine loading time, no lag.

Proper submission and crediting: 5 points
You need images, more info.

Dialog: 3 points
Not so good of a dialog. Needs more of a ancient feeling. You use todays words, and make me believe like two todays people are talking.

Music and or voice acting: 2 points
You need custom music to make you a better atmosphere, sounds make about 50% of the cinematic in my book.

In overall: 52 / 100
49% minimal 52% met.
For the hive grade: 2/5 I suggest this map for: On Hold
-------------------------------------------------
In overall it is a cinematic that is okay, but I can't say it is good. You need a lot more work:

- Fix the camera in ground shrinking
- Improve camera
- Improve dialog
- Improve terrain
- Improve music
- No sky
- Knight mount - bandit, where the hell is the horse?

Here is my tutorial that I think it's helpful:

http://www.hiveworkshop.com/forums/f278/various-tips-cinematic-maker-112768/

Improve and update and I may just vote you for approval.

Good Luck, bounty hunter2
I might not be checking this topic for some time. If you have any questions about the review or you update the map and want me to check it again, feel free to PM me or Visitor message me at any time.

 

[Thorneon]

ok thanks. Ill try to work on all those. It is my first complete map, so I didn't expect it to get a great review anyways. And does a murloc talk like an ancient person?

 

[White-Lion]

well im sorry to say but this is just a cheap copy of thralls life
(lord of the clan)
esxept that this is a chinematic

 

[Thorneon]

...never heard of it.

 

[Thorneon]

Update!!!!!

 

[Melthal]

4/5 was pretty good for your first map.

 

[Thorneon]

thanks melthal

 

[ModelTester]

Good job for your first map

 

[Thorneon]

thanks

 

[bounty hunter2]

bounty hunter2's Review on Garner's Quest

Warning this review contains spoilers.

I have watched this cinematic about a week ago and today.

Garner's Quest is a cinematic that revolves around a Murloc and an archer companion of his.

To start, the terrain. It was done generally badly. It was to flat or to heighted, like the height used where the prison cells are. Oh and how logical it is to have prison cells on the open? Not much. The trees are bad, especially the northrend ones, you should rather import trees. There wasn't a sky model used, you should really use it. The cameras weren't good aswell, there were a lot of static parts, remember keep your camera fluid at all time. On some cameras I could see empty non used terrain, I suggest you fix that. The plot was fine, a story of a captured Murloc and his archer apprentice escaping. However some of it just didn't make any sense, such as when the Jailor picked them up and said: "This is the Kings army, if you do anything..." And when the archer said I surrender to the footmans, then fought them and then escaped. The fade filters were a mess aswell, they sometimes fade in too early.

To conclude, this cinematic wasn't done in the best manners of triggering and terraining, however it still has a decent story, runs fine and is partly entertaining. For that reasons, 2/5 (Lacking) and Approved! However there are still a lot of things you should work on, terrain, cameras, fade filters, battle scenes and plot.

 

[Thorneon]

YAY! one thing i have to say is when she says surrender she is saying it to garner because he was right and they shoulda gone to the crypt but i didnt want to say give up because that seems more modern. As for the jailer, that was one of the parts that i just coudnt think of a good way to let them escape. Also, the prison cell is just meant to keep them from easily escaping, the guards usually beat the prisoners before they put them in the prison. The prison is also not maintained and old. thanks for the review!

 

[knight26]

hmm well some dodads and camera lacks but i guess this is acceptable. :S

 

[Thorneon]

Yay! approval from not only bounty but knight too

 

[ThePanda]

LOl A talking Murloc xD Thats %ucking original

 

[deepstrasz]

1.5/5. Mostly nonsense.