End of Pain

[Linaze]

Something emotional I wrote some time ago, I find it sad and if I am allowed to say it myself, I kind of like it.

You treat me fair,
that I respect.
You unlike others,
accept me as I am.
I wish there was another way,
but I know there is not.
Tell them that they are why,
and know that you are not.
I tell you this as I say goodbye,
let us meet on the other side.

 

[arafor]

I really liked this and it shows some deep emotions which is always good. These are the kind of poems I like

 

[~Void~]

Ah dear. It appears we have another amateur emo poet. In order to truly channel your dark emotions through the wonders of poetry, one must do it in one's mind in total silence in a dark and lonely corner, and if you believe hard enough, someone just might happen to hear you... or not.

 

[Thelastheretic]

A little emo, once in a while, never hurt anyone.

On the other hand,
...
...
...
you have different fingers.

Speaking from a technical standpoint: It doesn't flow. Maybe I'm utterly off-base here, but I couldn't fine the rhythm at which the words sounded right. That third line just murdered my tongue.

The emotion was good. The seeming genuine nature of it sounded good.
Conclusion: Keep writing.

 

[Pyramidhe@d]

"Tell them that they are why" that line kinda is hard to say for me.
other wise a very sad poem

 

[Super-Sheep]

Add "/cut the wrist" to the end?