Elune's Daughters -> first chapter (beta version)

[Elusirei]

Hello, everyone! I am Elusirei and I am creating a night elf dedicated campaign. I am a new mapmaker and this is the first chapter in the campaign.

Adora Nightshade ~ Priestess of Elune. She was trained alongside Tyrande Whisperwind under the wing of the Mother Priestess Dejahna. Unfortunately, the mother priestess died in the War of the Ancients. Adora is sent to the battlefield as a healer, and she befriends 4 warrioresses: Kate Starsong, Kathris Chillwind, Destria Barkskin and Estiria Moonray. Adora is very merciful and caring, relating to her sisters as a mother.

Kate Starsong ~ Sentinel Captain. Kate is an agile and strong archer, who raised in ranks in the Great War. She became very close to Adora and is very willing to follow the path of the Godess. Thus, she became her personal guard, and started to learn the powers of Elune from Priestess Adora. Kate's lover, a strong druid, taught her how to create her connection with nature, Kate learning from him how to call upon the lightning to strike against the demons. Unfortunately, her lover died at the hands of Azzinoth.

Destria Barkskin ~ military officer in the Kaldorei Resistance. A strong and bulky huntress with powerful leadership. She is sometimes cold towards others, being always the one to rush in the battle, distracting the enemy, and being able to absorb a lot of damage. She sometimes shows arrogance and a cold behaviour, but Destria remains an honourable and brave leader of the night elves in battle.

Kathris Chillwind ~ Druidess Assassin. Trained as an assassin in the night elven army, Kathris can deal deadly damage to her enemies, if she user her stealth. She followed the Path of Cenarius alongside Malfurion Stormrage, and seeks to continue her druidic training. Although significantly weaker than Malfurion, Kathris' perseverance and affinity towards the powers of nature make her a promising guardian of Kalimdor. Also, she started to teach the powers of nature to her sisters too, future druidesses being trained to keep the night elven lands in the absence of the druids.

Estiria Moonray ~ military officer. Second in command of her squad after Destria, Estiria is a powerful mele warrioress, and the first one who learned druidism from Kathris. Estiria and Kate created a strong friendship, Estiria learning the powers of Elune from Kate.
Estiria doesn't like Destria too much because of her coldness and arrogance that she shows sometimes, but recognises her as a very worthy leader.

The Godess Elune ~ the godess of the night elves. Elune is the Moon Godess that keeps the night elven race and enhances them with her powers, to heal, empower themselves, and strike their enemies. Even if Adora is not the Mother Priestess, she is the most favourite in the eyes of the Elune for her nobleness, mercy and caring for her people.

 

[Pyrogasm]

The main focus is on the priestesses of Elune and their powers in connection with the nature teachings of the druids. The story follows directly from chapter 2 the events of Warcraft 3, with some changes, this moment in chapter 1 being the root of the story.

Probably not the feedback you want here, but it's an honest answer that surprised me and may provide some perspective/direction. The important preface is that I literally do not know the wc3 story beats (I've played the campaign maybe once through in my entire life).

The green sentence means something to me; I can imagine (vaguely) what that might entail and have a general vibe of warcraft druids. The orange sentence is completely meaningless to me and gives me no information or reason to care. If I knew more about the main campaign I might get what you mean... or if you described it in a way that forced me to understand by reading.

I'm not trying to be rude or belittle your project, but rather to suggest a way to improve your reach. By alluding to something and then not describing it, I think you are likely to miss people with your campaign who might otherwise enjoy it. It's not necessary to give extreme detail about what will happen in the campaign but I think you would benefit significantly from describing the situation with the priestesses/druids, how your campaign sees/interprets/changes those things, and the general 'lore' around the moment in time you're expanding. People often play campaigns because they like stories and not for incredible gameplay, right? So sell your story!

 

[Elusirei]

Alright, you are right about the preface here, but have you played it? I have a lot of lore in the chapter and I wanted to not give out too much and just say it briefly, because it would be repetitive and it might cause disconfort to the player.

 

[Pyrogasm]

No, I did not. My point is not that you don't have the information somewhere in the map, but that when describing your project (like you did here) how you describe it is more important than you might think. Like in a business sense: no matter how good your product is nobody will buy it if your marketing is terrible and doesn't convince people they want/need that product. I'm suggesting that a description that gives information other than "remember chapter 1 and 2 of the main campaign" would benefit you here.

 

[Elusirei]

Good point and thank you! I hope to hear you again after you played it!