Redemption

[Nodrek]

Hello everyone, as it seems i find a new thing about the hive i didn't notice before and one of them is this part of the forum (you gotta admit that the forums have a lot of section i tell you my first week was like finding my way through a labyrinth but all in all it is quite well organized).

I began writing this story like 6 months ago it is almost complete (in editing phase) i don't know if it is any good but i thought i should take some hints/opinions from the people that would like to peak at it.

I will try to keep a constant periodic time for posting each chapter and here is chapter one (prologue).

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Redemption

Chapter I :



The bells of the old city was once again rung, since hundreds of years when they were last heard at the brink of terror and disaster, the rings of the bell in the high castle tower and in the churches came blazing more and more, a terror stroke through the people's heart, as guards are assembling everywhere inside the castle.

"Damn! How can this be? Why now? I just took the post two days ago; I can't believe this", thought the guards' captain as he strode down the isles of the city to reach the front gate, quickly to not run in late.

Rain came down the sky heavier than ever, such rain wasn't to be seen in this part of lands since along time, a dark cloaked figure looked around him to see chaos filling the place, not a place that he can see that isn't torched or scourged, fire everywhere, dead people in every corner, a great massacre was here.

He couldn't believe his eyes when he saw the almost still body, she wasn't moving much, he knelt to the almost lifeless body, "*Cough*…*cough*… Nodek… i-is that you…" said the woman in man's arm.

"yes… save your strength, everything going to be ok just lie down and rest." said Nodek lying to her, as he is sure there are no force in this earth that can change what happened nor mend it.

"Save…s-sa-ve.. Them… you hav-e to ..save them, they ha-ve.. No one.. Don't abandon them… lo-ve is th-e o--nl-y" and with that un finished sentence her head tilted a little bit to the left side and her gaze remained a still…

All those thoughts came down the cloaked figure's mind as if thousand hammers have been striking over it without mercy and remorse, caring no more about the rain coming down on him, it was now the rain in his eyes the reign in his thoughts, that he can feel or see.

The Captain reached the front gate to see what could cause this mess, there was no way on earth he would have believed what he just saw, no one was capable of pulling that.

He saw the dark cloaked figure moving in with great haste, not caring about anything in the world, not even nature stopping him.

"To me men, to me.." said the Captain to his men, as twenty of the cavalry have joined him and about a dozen archers stationed their places on the towers and the walls of the gate.

"On my command, archers give him all the arrows you can master.." as he turned to the cavalry "let's hope that should stop him.." said the Captain yet not too confident of his decision.

The cloaked figure with the rain pouring over his face, not nature's own soothing rain, his tears, it was building up his hatred, his wrath, all raging through his mind as he approaches the little army guarding that gate.

"Release your arrows" shouted the Captain as dozens and dozens of arrows flew in the air towards the cloaked figure, forming a dark cloud, a dark cloud of death.

As the captain watches the dark cloud of arrows sails through the sea of rain in the sky searing down towards the figure and yet the dark cloaked man still advancing not flinching or showing any signs of retreat.

"I don't fear death…" said the dark figure as the cloud almost approaches him without hesitating or fear he picks up haste towards it as well...
Chapter I
http://www.hiveworkshop.com/forums/showthread.php?t=586081&post=586081
Chapter II
http://www.hiveworkshop.com/forums/showthread.php?t=593479&post=593479
Chapter III
http://www.hiveworkshop.com/forums/showthread.php?t=598472&post=598472
Chapter IV
http://www.hiveworkshop.com/forums/showthread.php?t=660409&post=660409
Chapter V
http://www.hiveworkshop.com/forums/showthread.php?t=662752&post=667252
Chapter VI
http://www.hiveworkshop.com/forums/showthread.php?t=663737&post=663737

 

[PainMoth]

It's pretty good but a lot of grammar mistakes. Take your whole second paragraph for instance.

"Damn, how can this be, why now, I just took the post two days ago, I can't believe this" thought the guards' Captain as he strode down the isles of the city to reach the front gate hopefully not too late.

It should be like this. Note I tried to remove the pointless run on sentences you keep making with commas. It's used improperly.

"Damn! How can this be? Why now? I just took the post two days ago; I can't believe this", thought the guards' captain as he strode down the isles of the city to reach the front gate, quickly to not run in late.

 

[Nodrek]

Edited it, thank you very much.
I know my use of "; , ." isn't very well i am really sorry but with your help i could learn a few things, going to revise it now a second time and i am glad to see some one that liked it...

 

[Nodrek]

And here is the second chapter (i think in a couple of days i would finish 3 and maybe even 4)

Chapter II

Night came swift and clear on the city of Tarul, it hasn’t had many nights like this for some time, with the present conditions it was hard to imagine that a moon of that clearance and brightness would ever visit such lands, not for along time at least.

As the moon reflects it shiny light upon the city streets, it caught a well built man in his average 40ies he dressed in full armor, an iron mail plate on his chest, an iron helmet on his head imprinted on it the sign of the city as well as his mail plate, his sword in his sheath, a long sword that resembles those of the early crusades in the western lands.

The man was walking down the main street of Tarul city as a clap of thunder was heard in this sky, clearly the sky has decided that the city doesn't yet deserve such clear sky in the present time, the man looked up and started to make haste, he quit the main street and started to go into allies, dirty allies, that he wouldn't probably visit under any other circumstances, he ran from a street to another for some time till finally he came to a halt in front one of the doors in that dirty ally.

"KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK" came the sound of the door thuds as the man in armor waited for the answer.

It wasn't long before the door was opened, a young man in his average 20ies came out from behind the door, he was puzzled, it was a surprise for the young man to see the man in armor at his own door step.

"Nodek, I see you have changed in the past 3 years, I am sorry to have come at such late time."

"Captain Fander, i..i am surprised really it has been a long time since I last saw you, please come in." as the young man in his 20ies opened the door some more to make room for Captain Fander to enter.

Captain Fander looked through Nodek's house it wasn't much, the room he was in had only a table made of wood and two chairs placed almost randomly across the room, clearly the young man doesn't receive guests on a frequent phase.

Nodek was a young man in his 20ies he had a round hard face well built body and dressed in dark clothes, he had long black hair, untidy, and he had brown eyes.

Nodek offered Captain Fander a seat and he gladly accepted it, "How are you Nodek, it has been a long time since I last saw you?" said Captain Fander.

"I have been living, how is the deal with the city safety?" as Nodek said that, Captain Fander drew a faint smile on his face.

"Not too well, the king is in over his head, you know, the rebels, Rogues, Thieves, other cities trying desperately to take over ours in this desperate times." said Captain Fander.

"Ahhh, well you always know how I feel about politics. "said Nodek with a smile on his face trying to get what has brought the chief of guards in this late time.

"Which brings me to the reason I came here, The king have too much pressure going on on him, and there are much problems that would need to be solved, and most of them are rather solved under the table than in public if you know what I mean?" said the Captain trying to reach his point as soon as possible.

"In same manner, yes, but what does that relate to me in?" said Nodek, he knew what the Captain would ask but he wanted to hear it from him.

"Well, the king needs a man of your talents and we both know how would that be of benefit to him; with your talents he as I see will be able to… how can I say this… eradicate his problems more swiftly." said the Captain in hopes now that Nodek would accept.

"I see, and what is in it for me?" said Nodek, he didn't care for the king, the city, or anyone, he always hated that kind of thoughts politics had enough deceit to last anyone a life time and surely he wouldn't mind to miss it.

"Apart from the king's gratitude, you would get a payment after each quest you will finish it for him." said Captain Fander pleased that Nodek has some what agreed.

"I don't care for the king's gratitude, I could certainly use the payment as you can see, I will only agree to this on one condition I won't take orders from anyone, once I am out I am out, and I have the right to refuse any quest, and I certainly don't comply to any authority of this city." said Nodek.

"You the king won't agree to these demands, you are insane." said Captain Fander shocked he almost got convinced that his job is done.

"I won't allow myself to be a tool in his hand, a puppet to use me in any way he wants, and if I remember correctly it was you who taught me that." said Nodek building out rage, he was upset from the Captain because of following the king ever so blindly not questioning his orders or ever dared to talk to hi about anything.

"Yes I did, but you see Nodek time changes, and the King is in desperate need for us, in this time, and I think with me being on his side at this time, I can help him more than I would do if I go question every order he gives simply that some of them might seem irrational." said Captain Fander as he stood up, after all it wasn't a fair deal for Nodek to insult him in that manner.

"Those are my conditions, if he agrees, I agree." said Nodek, on this moment the Captain stood up "I will see what I can do" said Captain Fander as he opened the door and left the place.

It wasn't long before the Captain Fander went back for Nodek, in fact the following night Captain Fander went back to Nodek's house.

"The king has requested to see you, Nodek" said Captain Fander upon arriving on Nodek's house.

"I see." Replied Nodek coldly.

Chapter I
http://www.hiveworkshop.com/forums/showthread.php?t=586081&post=586081
Chapter II
http://www.hiveworkshop.com/forums/showthread.php?t=593479&post=593479
Chapter III
http://www.hiveworkshop.com/forums/showthread.php?t=598472&post=598472
Chapter IV
http://www.hiveworkshop.com/forums/showthread.php?t=660409&post=660409
Chapter V
http://www.hiveworkshop.com/forums/showthread.php?t=662752&post=667252
Chapter VI
http://www.hiveworkshop.com/forums/showthread.php?t=663737&post=663737

 

[Nodrek]

Chapter III

In the outskirts of Tarul city, two people started their short journey, they both went down the path that lead to the forest, Anub forest, lies in the western part of the city.

People rarely pondered down that path because of how thick this forest is, and few years ago, it was the place of the disaster that changed the city's life; yes, the people have forgot all about the disaster by now 30 years have passed since the incident, but still the forest tended to remind them with it; people from time to time that ever came to that path have said stories about flying fire balls and walking water ghosts and such things, it was enough to keep people out of it for some time.

Nodek though knew too well that those are merely people talk nothing more and nothing less, indeed it was the lair of extension but that was long ago, and that was proven all too well in that condemned night he was born in.

He followed Captain Fander along the path, it was made out of stone and occasionally some fallen leaves from the trees that stood along the path, as they moved in even further Captain Fander was forced to light a torch, the moon light wasn't clearly visible by now, people knew too well that traveling by day in such forest will take ages because sun light is always hindered by the trees, and certainly in the nick of night it won't be any easier.

Finally after about a half an hour of walk and moving in and out of the path they came to a cave's entrance, it has those weird markings; Nodek knew them too well..

"Where are you going Captain?" asked Nodek hesitatively, "You know what that cave belongs to, don't you?".

"Of course, who won't remember him, the king have chosen this place only because it won't be seen nor anyone would dare to look down for it, people are too afraid to come near here as you know, aside from that it has been abandoned for more than 30 years now." said Captain fander with a faint smile drawing on his face.

The captain entered the cave, Nodek hesitatively followed in, The cave was dim and old, dirt and small rocks fell down the minute they entered "It looks like we arrived before your King, Captain, is he going to be late?" said Nodek wiping out the Dirt from his clothes.

"The king is already in there waiting for you?" said the captain, it didn't make any sense the entrance seemed to be fresh on new people Nodek thought.

They walked a little down a hallway till they came to a cross roads, a part of the rocks that constructed the cave there was nothing there not even a torch nothing but rocks and vine trees that grown over the years.

Captain Fander stood in front of the cross roads for a moment gazing at the ceiling of the cave "I hope you know where are we going Captain." said Nodek not feeling any easy about any of what is happening.

"Certainly I do, ahhh here it is, the mark on the ceiling, my GOD, it is the same as always it never faded." said the Captain.

They continued walking down the left path from the cross, the walls in that path was different fro the ones at the entrance it was full of cracks, to anyone that would look at them he would suspect nothing more than the art of time and nature, but they knew far more than that, the cracks was made in a pattern that might seem chaotic to some but truly it is nothing but a pattern, they all formed to one centre , the centre of the wall it self where all cracks fade just as if it simply was wiped off the wall like dirt.

They moved along the path as it tilted left and right with them until they came to a dead end, a wall the blocked their path the Captain knelt down to his knees and lifted a trap door that was there, Nodek didn't see the trap door at first in fact he didn't even realize it was there, the hatch had the same texture as the floor and even covered with vine trees just the same as the floor; The Captain descended down the hatch and there Nodek followed him.

The room they entered was very dim even more darker than the past areas, Vine trees haven't touched the place here to Nodek's wonder after all how would trees grow without roots, then again he remembered that this place isn't like any other place, this was a cused place; he realized that to his right and to his left there stood two statues of a weird creature something that is like a hybrid between humans and dragons, it has the body structure of a human, the legs, the belly, the chest, even the head place above the throat, the only thing is that the head is of a dragon, it had a tail with a pointy spiked end which a lantern had been hung to it, and all over it's back there is some scaly spikes formed in a line with the same length and width and thickness.

Nodek tried to stretch his vision across the room but the faint torch light wasn't helping, the room was pitch black, he decided to follow Captain Fander as he passed through, and to their surprised once Nodek went past the two statues in the wall, the lanterns in their tails sprang to life, they both literally jumped at that instant, the creatures' heads started to give a faint glow as if it has came back to life, but that was just a light effect nothing as Nodek have approached the statue to inspect it.

"You came here before Captain?" said Nodek now suspecting that the Captain might know something about what is going on here.

"No, the king described the way nothing more, is .. Is it alive?" said Captain Fander with a rather almost shaky voice.

"I think not, the creature seems to have some kind of layer over it that reacts to this specific light, or we would have seen it before when your torch was near it." said Nodek "I wonder why would the king ever want to come to this forsaken place."

"We will know in a matter of moments, have patience." said Captain Fander as relief starts to overcome him as time passes.

After the lanterns of the two creatures got lit the room ,miracously, came to life, they saw it had a table in the middle the table contained a book, the book was covered with spider webs and dust, clearly it has been abandoned like this since a long time, Nodek approached the book and looked at the pages, and to his amazement he found that the pages are all white, he lifted the book carefully to look at it ore closely.

"There is no time for this, we need to to move more quickly we don't want to keep the king waiting." said Captain Fander his voice now was filled with fear, but Nodek's curiosity was overcoming his rational mind, how can this book be so empty, and how it is still here in the first place.

"yes, you are probably right." said Nodek as he put back the book where it was.

The continued walking to the end of the room when Captain Fander saw a door, the door was simple and made of wood nothing on it not even a door knob, but it had a whole in the middle, the Captain stretched his hand and grabbed the door from the whole and pulled it, he looked inside and then came out, "The king awaits you Nodek." said the Captain making a way for Nodek to enter.

Chapter I
http://www.hiveworkshop.com/forums/showthread.php?t=586081&post=586081
Chapter II
http://www.hiveworkshop.com/forums/showthread.php?t=593479&post=593479
Chapter III
http://www.hiveworkshop.com/forums/showthread.php?t=598472&post=598472
Chapter IV
http://www.hiveworkshop.com/forums/showthread.php?t=660409&post=660409
Chapter V
http://www.hiveworkshop.com/forums/showthread.php?t=662752&post=667252
Chapter VI
http://www.hiveworkshop.com/forums/showthread.php?t=663737&post=663737

 

[Nodrek]

Chapter IV

The room was a small room and from the looks of it, it might have been a cell or a little prison room, on the floor some chains have been thrown to one corner on the wall in front of the door there is a little window with three bars covering it from which you can see the full moon high on the sky, beside the door there are two of the creatures' statues this time they were lit already and another two beside the window, the ones beside the window though didn't have lanterns on their tails but rather a long spike longer than the lantern ones, on the wall next to the window a simple table is put there an old table some papers and ink bottles have been dropped there where dust poured over them along the years, behind the table there was a huge chair one that looks like a stone throne a dark stone chair that pared the same mark as the one on the cave entrance, and on it sat what can be guessed to be the King.

The king didn't move as Nodek entered the room, Nodek gazed upong him trying to see his face but couldn't as the shadows have covered it, he can only see his hands, apparently the king is very old his hands has a lot of wrinkles and a ring a very neat forged golden ring that had markings of the city on it, "My king this Nodek, the one I told you about." said Captain Fander.

The king replied in a rather deep voice, with a faint of squeakiness in it "Yes, Captain Fander have told me a lot about you Nodek, he has informed as well that you have certain demands to agree off what have been presented to you." said the king.

"Yes, and I think the Captain have told you about them." said Nodek confident from himself.

"Well, I think we would come to a close agreement only if you would agree that you would defend the city when it most need, yes?" said the king simply and plain, clearly the king isn't the man that likes to go around subject and prefer to get to the point.

"I am no Guard." said Nodek, he hated the thought of being under the king's boots.

"Of course not, a man with your talents must come to bit more usefulness." said the king drawing a smile on his face.

"I will see what I can do." said Nodek trying to evade a direct confirmation to the question.

"Fair enough for me." said the king "Well, then, Nodek, you will be working along with Captain Fander, he will make sure that you know the basics of combat, a rather dull even for you I presume, but it won't hurt to show us some of your talents, now as you have known the place that you will be meeting me each time, Captain Fander will show you the place where you can stay, this place will remain a secret and not to be told to anyone, if you please Nodek, and now I know you are tired and the talk is already done, Captain Fander will show you, the place where you can have some rest and tomorrow morning he will explain everything to you that you might feel is vague" as he finished the sentence he drew close to Nodek getting out of the shadows to reveal half of his face, an there you could see a man in his late 50ies wrinkles covering his face, white hair and wearing a small thin crown with diamonds on it's face going round his head in a half circle.

Captain Fander took the lead once again and escorted Nodek out of the place the same way they entered, they went back to the city from the forest, there they went to the main street and as they were walking Nodek realized he wasn't headed to his house, "Where are you going Captain?" said Nodek.

"You won't use your house anymore Nodek, the king thinks it would be much safer for you to be under his eyes and that you would cut all your connections with anyone you knew from the past." said Captain Fander in rather a dull voice, he didn't want Nodek to argue and to an extent he didn't want Nodek to feel that he had betrayed him.

"Captain, we didn't agree to this, you never told me that, how dare you?" said Nodek with a loud voice, and anger seeping through his senses.

"What do you want me to do? Huh? The man has all the reasons to do that, you almost went to join the Rogue's league, how can he trust you completely, sure he has his doubts, and you should thank me for not leaving you going down the drain, the king was about to initiate an attack against the Rogues' camps and slaughter every one there, I try to save you from yourself and this how you repay me by shouting at me?" now the captain as in rage after the Captain was Nodek's Father friend and he always despised the way Nodek have turned out when he grown up, he forgot the ways of his father and the nobility of his family he gave it up, surely he has his reasons and anyone else might have been forgiven for it, but after what the Captain had done for him, it wasn't to be forgiven at all.

Nodek looked down to the ground he knew too well that the Captain was right, and that he probably have saved his life by doing so, he didn't want to escalate things any more so he chose to keep silent and walked after the Captain without saying a word, they went left on the next street and there they found a little hut, in a remote part of the city, clearly the king didn't want anyone to notice Nodek too, some how Nodek felt that this isn't all going as he expected, but he had to agree to what have been put in front of him now.

The captain stood in front of the door "This is where you going to stay Nodek, make sure that you are ready by down, the king wants to see your talents, he wants to make sure you are up to the task at your hand." said Captain Fander in a rather calm voice.

"I am sorry Captain." said Nodek, showing regret but he meaning half of it.

"It is alright, prepare for combat tomorrow." with this words the captain Left Nodek at the door step and went back to the castle.

Nodek stood there for a moment to look at the shiny full moon in the sky, some would say it is a moon of luck and some would say it is the moon of all evil, but no one knew for a fact the true sign of this, only that there is hope that everything could head for a better life.

 

[~Void~]

I find that many stories lack imagery. The action in this piece is great, but you need to focus a lot more on details and describing the environment.

 

[Nodrek]

I am glad you liked this, yeah i know i am poor in the detail matter but i am trying to work it out, more chapters will be added soon.

Thank you for giving your opinion it really helps

 

[Nodrek]

Chapter V

It wasn't much of a difference to Nodek, the hut. It was a small village hut, it has al the necessary elements that anyone of that age wood need, a stove, a bed, chiars, a table, only what is necessary.

Nodek woke up that morning dressed up and waited for Captain Fander, and he didn't wait for too long.

A knock on the door came just as dawn came to the sky announcing the birth of a new day. Nodek opened the door, the Captain was standing in front of the door step in his usual full armor except the helmet, he wasn't much fond of it, only wore it on times of need.

"Are you ready for your training?" called Captain Fander to Nodek "And a good morning to you too." said Nodek with some sarcasm after all he just seen him since yesterday and curtsey would obligate a man to start a conversation with a fine wish like that..

"Yes, I am ready Captain." said Nodek as they started to march taking the main road to the castle.
A half an hour later they arrived at the castle, they entered the castle from it's back hidden door, usually used by the soldiers when they about to initiate an expected attack upon their enemies. Of course they wouldn't use the front gate, that was reserved for the king.

The gate lead directly to the guards area, it had about a dozen room all dormitories for the guards that lived there. They passed the dormitories and onto the main training field just behind the guards' building.

Normally this area would be full of guards in training and wrestling each other, but today it was remarkable empty and more even bizarre than usual is that the king himself was standing in one of the balconies in the palace, Nodek deduced that this training is something the king ordered just to make sure that Nodek do have "abilities" and would be worthy of this "honour" to work with the him.

The arena was set with 2 cages, one of them was a very large cage that had about 20 or more prisoners all in chains and all were fighting and being cursed by the guards that are trying to keep them down, the other cage however was full of armor and weapons. It doesn't need a wise man to realize what is happening and sure it didn't take Nodek much, he knew what is going to happen here from the first moment, and he didn't like it a bit, but if the king wishes for a demonstration, he thought he might give him a hell of one.

The two cages were linked to each other front to front, as in the front door of the cage with the prisoners is almost touching the front door of the armory cage, and the armory cage had only one back door. Nodek knew that the king will make him enter throw that door choose an armor and a weapon and make him enter to the prisoners' cage to fight them.

"Ahh Nodek, how nice of you to join us today." came the high voice of the King from the balcony as he started walking into the arena. "As Captain Fander have been telling me, you have eccentric abilities, and that is why he picked you" a smile began to invade the kings face as he speaks, "But as you see I am a man of reality, someone that won't believe until he sees, and I think that is why you are here today, simply to prove your wits in front of us." said the king now happy and excited like a child that has been given his birthday gift.

"Captain, you knew of this?, you know that he is turning that into some kind of a show?" Nodek now was angry.

"Hardly, he told me that today you will be training with the guards but nothing of the sort." said Captain Fander some what surprised from all that is going on.

"What would we gain from killing innocent lives?" yelled Nodek from the arena so his sound can be heard.

"Who said they were innocent, my dear Nodek, those are the prisoners condemned with death penalty and all are to be executed in public, they are one of the veracious and most traitorous people among thieves and murderers, they all deserve their death, but come now, don't be so sure about yourself, we yet to see what you have got." said the king as his laughter rang through the arena.

The king then nodded to one of the guards, he approached the prisoners' cage and opened the door, then went to the armory cage and opened the front door, an they released the prisoners from their chains.
Nodek, didn't see that coming, the armors and weapons weren't for him, they were for his enemies, he won't execute them simply, he have to fight then one by one, till the end. A rather death encounter for any regular man.

"Don't be afraid Nodek we won't release them all for you, in fact to make things easier I would say you would start off with 5 of them? Huh?" said the king as he waved with hands for the guard, and he in turns opened the gate for the first group of the prisoners to come out of the armory cage from it's back door.

Captain Fander was lead at that moments by the guards to the nearest safest high grounds and the prisoners and Nodek were left in the middle of the Arena without any one to interfere in the fight what so ever.

The group of prisoners started to emerge from the cage door, the first man that got out with a skinny guy with a dark colored skin, from the looks of it he wasn't much of a strong fellow, he carried a large club and a wooden shield, remarkably Nodek realized that this club needs a man with a little more strength so he can bare it's weight, the second guy was a short one and a little chubby he was carrying a pair of short swords and he was wearing a wooden plate on his chest, the third guy had an axe he was tall well built and had a lot of scars on his face, Nodek knew at once that this man is no toying with. The fourth and fifth guy were brothers they were both thin and well built, they had swords and shields and they got out of the cage together.

One by one they started to approach Nodek, they were ready to fight, but Nodek wasn't; he didn't have any weapons with him nor he had any armor, only a black cape and a black hood, and those won't last him in the fight, he had to rely on his abilities, that is about it.

As the group approached and almost arrived at his position forming a circle around him, he realized that this group isn't organized, in the matter of fact, they didn't even cast roles to each other, nor had a leader, they are diving head first into battle an that was his way through into them.

Nodek leant down putting one hand behind his back as if to draw a weapon and the other in front of him to steady his position. The prisoners stopped for a second from his sudden move and then when they knew that this is nothing more than a move they continued down his path and formed a circle around him.

It was the short guy who first attacked he broke the circle and ran towards Nodek raising one of his hands with the short swords up in the air. Nodek strafed left, placed his feet in front of his path and the man feel down on his face, Nodek hurried to disarm him from his weapons. But at this instant the skinny guy with the club came running at Nodek waving his club, Nodek at the last second was able to crouch down and tackle the guy, the man was thrown to the floor and broke his head. Nodek wasn't much pleased of his death, but it wasn't his fault if the guy didn't wave around with that club he wouldn't have landed in that weird position.

The short guy got up on his feat and picked up his swords, he tried to stab Nodek in the back, but Nodek rolled in his position grabbed the man from his throat and disarmed on of his two hands, the tall guy with the axe came hurrying to the aid of the short guy but Nodek throw the short guy and the man running, the tall man stopped to catch his friend, Nodek ran at both men and knelt and rolled with his left feet stretched to flip the two guys on their back at that point the two brothers came hurrying shouting at him from the back, after Nodek flipped the short and the tall guy, he rotated 180 degrees and flipped the two brothers to the ground, then got up.

With the 4 men down and the skinny guy accidentally dead, the first group was defeated, so they took a side, and the guards released two guys this time.

The first one carried two daggers, the other had a sword and a shield, from the looks of it, those two were the best ones to fight. They came both walking down at Nodek, he wasn’t feeling any easy about facing them, they seem very well trained not like the ones before them.

They both attacked at the same time, Nodek evaded two of their slow blows that almost would have killed him if they landed, he kept retreating and using one to shield himself from the other, it seemed that the two plates of the balance are equal. The fight went on for like 10 minutes and none of the three men showed any signs of fatigue.

The king grew wary from the situation so he thought he should push Nodek to his limit, after all this so called training was made only to make Nodek show off his powers nothing more.

The king looked at one of the guards beside him and he ordered the guards to release the prisoners. That when Nodek stood there mesmerized, he didn't believe that he will have to fight 19 prisoners all at one time all alone and without any help. "My king, this is his death not training, he won't possibly be able to kill all of those at the same time, at least reduce the number." said Captain Fander, he had enough of what is going on, certainly Nodek can take out 5 with his abilities but 19 that number is too much, he never seen a man do it.

The king said Nothing, instead he ordered his guards to march around Captain Fander to prevent him from giving any assistance to Nodek what so ever. As Nodek stood there not comprehending what is happening the guy with the sword hit him in the guts and Nodek feel to the ground, at that point the two men retreated to join the other 17 prisoners where 4 of them were already grabbing some parts of their bodies from the injuries he have inflicted on them from he previous fight. They again formed a circle around him and started to shout announcing they are ready to fight..

Nodek looked at them from underneath his hood, and helped himself up again, "If the king wants you dead, then be it, COME TO ME, FACE YOUR DEATH.." as Nodek shouted at them, the king began to smile, he was about to get what he wants.

As rage built up in Nodek's mind he pulled back his cape and leant once again placing one hand behind him and the other in front of him, he declared the start of the fight, their or his death..

The first to move from the circle was the man with the daggers, he approached him slowly, Nodek saw that there was one of the prisoners holding a bow and some arrows and two of the prisoners gathered around him to protect him. Nodek stood his ground, the prisoner with the daggers kept coming nearer, till it reached the distance that Nodek wanted.

The prisoners didn't know what happened nor how, the king was watching in awe, Nodek had leapt in the air, at such height no one would have believed unless he would see it, while in the air he grabbed the prisoner with the dagger from his head and landed with it to the ground, the prisoner with the dagger was on the ground dead. As Nodek got up he took the two daggers; he was armed.

The prisoners started to digest what happened, the archer started to unleash his arrows, and the prisoners all of them at once started to run at Nodek closing down the circle at him. No one believed anything of that day, not the guards, not the king, not even the sole survivor from the prisoners. Nodek have unleashed his power.

 

[Nodrek]

Chapter VI

In the distant remote parts of the city of Tarul, a little house, a hut, still had some light in it, and in those times, that wasn't very normal, pople used to sleep at the start of the night, but this house was different, something was going on.

"You, you did that, you killed your mother, it is all your fault." shouted the man standing in front of the table, he was shouting at the little boy hiding underneath it, the boy was merly 10 years old, he was wearing old worn out clothes, he was skinny with a short hair, dark short hair.

The main was tall well built, he wore the clothes of the royal guards, apparently he just arrived home a moment ago, when the man arrived he found his sick wife releasing her last breathes, he didn't believe that she will die, he thought it was all a dream, since that night everything went to wreck, everything changed, he wasn't the same man any more. Though his wife have tried to get her husband back to his former state, she couldn't, time have passed and the man's state became worse, he never went him but to sleep, he never checked on his wife nor talked to her, then one day she fell sick on the floor.
Since then her condition only gotten worse, and instead of being beside her, the man choose to drink, to forget about it, he blamed her, he blamed "him" for everything, he never saw "him" for what who he is not what he could become.

He always hated his son, feared him, he always thought that Zeraphin would one day possess him, that the dark magic will one day overcome his good side, and that it was a mistake to leave him alive.

"You killed your own mother, DAMN Erwic and that priest, if it wasn't for them, I would have killed you now, the last part of Zeraphin, you should die" the man in the armor was filled with rage and agony, he was drawing his sword, he was blind with hate. The kid under the table was afraid, he was crying, he kept saying "I didn't kill her, it is your fault, I didn't mean for any of this to happen." he couldn't believe that his own father is pulling his sword to kill him.

The man pulled out his sword, and stricked once at the table, the kid was afraid, he ran from underneath the table, as the sword fell down on it, it shattered in pieces. "Don't run for me, you will die today, no one will save you." said the man running after his son, still holding the sword in his hands.

The little boy didn't know what to do, he ran around the house, while his father chased him around waving his sword left and right trying to hit the kid.

"Curse Zeraphin, Curse you Nodek, Curse Erwic, Curse the Priest, Curse all of you." the man was insane, he had lost his mind, his wife was the only thing that kept him almost sane in the last 10 years, and now she is dead…

Nodek ran from his father till he stumbled on a chair around the corner, his father drew nearer, as he fought to get up, he couldn't fear overcame his senses, he couldn't feel his legs, he couldn't feel his body, fear took over him. His father saw that he was on the floor helpless, he drew a knife from his clothes and threw it, it missed Nodek's head by a few inches. Nodek was mesmerized, he didn't know what to do. The man ran now towards Nodek, he was carrying his sword still, the man stood over Nodek's paralyzed body and raised his sword in front of him to stab Nodek in the chest, to kill him, once and for all, as he thought, to rid the world from his evil spirit.

As the sword started to descend fast against his chest, something clicked inside his mind, he didn't know what happened, but suddenly he rolled over took the knife from the ground beside him, as the sword still going down, he waited for it, till it was almost in his chest, he rolled once again to get away from the sword's path, grabbed the sword under his arm, pulled the sword. His father was astonished, he didn’t believe what is happening, then suddenly when Nodek pulled the sword, the man feel down on Nodek, Feeling a sharp pain in his shoulder.

Nodek had taken the knife from the ground and instinctively stabbed his father in the shoulder, defending himself. He got up from under his father's body to see what has he done. He didn't believe what has just happened. He felt as if he wasn't conscious when that happened.
He knelt down to his father and cried over him shouting his name, over and over again but his father passed out, a moment later a man broke the door and entered the house he was wearing a robe and holding a staff, he took the boy away from his father and sent him outside the house without even saying anything.

Then closed the door, Nodek watched from the window as the man took out the knife from his father's shoulder, and started to speak some weird language and gave him some sort of a drink. The man waited for a moment or tow then carried his father to his bed, then he got out, and went to Nodek.

Nodek didn't recognize the man, in fact he couldn't see his face, because of the hood, that he wore, he kept it in a position to prevent anyone from looking at his face, he knelt to Nodek.

"Nodek, what happened here?" said the man in a soft calm voice.
Nodek started to tell the man what happened, after Nodek have finished, he put his hands over his head and started patting him.
"I know you didn't mean that Nodek, Listen to me and listen carefully, your father was once a great man, and still is, he just lost his path, I think after what had happened here he won't be treating you like that anymore." said the man in the robe with a soothing voice.

"But I didn't mean it, I swear, I didn't know how I did this, I didn't…" as Nodek tried to explain to the man that he didn't know what happened, the man interrupted him "Nodek, you have to swear that this will be between you and me and it won't go outside the two of us alright?" said the man, Nodek felt that the man was looking at his eyes as if he was making sure that his word was true.

"I swear." Nodek replied sincerely.

"When you were, born Nodek, you were like no other child, you were very special, you won't understand this now maybe, but when you grow up you will. You were born with special powers, special abilities, You can move faster than anyone else, you have a high agility even higher than any human in this earth. You have to bear that in your mind, never use your abilities to harm others Nodek, never, you have a very heavy task on your shoulder, you must take of your father now, and prove to him that you aren't the bad person he thinks you are, work hard, and he will know, maybe it would be late, but he will know." as the man finished his words, he got up, patted Nodek on the back, then walked away to the forest, and then disappeared suddenly.



Saddly i am too busy the next 2 weeks or so, and the "inspiration" is kinda fading so in more words it may be some time before chapter 7 is finished (already started in it though) but once it is done i will post it, tell then... Enjoy.

 

[Teh_Ephy]

So you know, it would help if you added additional chapters to the first post, as well as posting them in the new post. It would save people who hadn't read it from the start the trouble of hunting through the thread for the chapters.

 

[Nodrek]

if i know how i would do it

 

[Teh_Ephy]

There's an "edit button" in the bottom right corner of every post you make. You can use that to edit your post. Copy/paste the text from the posts with the chapters into the first post. I have a thread that I tend to neglect, but I just post that the first post has been updated with a new chapter.

 

[Nodrek]

ohhh, i thought that you meant i would provide links to each post of mine (links to the chapters) in the first post.

I intended to do a new post in every chapter to separate the chapters from each other so people would recognize which is which...

if you can tell me how to link chapters in the first post i would gladly do it.

Thank you

 

[Teh_Ephy]

Linking the first post to other chapters would also work. To do that, copy "http://www.hiveworkshop.com/forums/showthread.php?p=XXXXXX#postXXXXXX" into your post. Replace the Xs with the number of your post. To find out the number of your post, take a look at the green number in the upper-right corner of your post. It will display something like "676566". That is the number you're looking for.

For example, this post I just made is #15. When I mouse over it, it displays "http://www.hiveworkshop.com/forums/showpost.php?p=[HIGHLIGHT]676761[/code]&postcount=15". That means my post number is the 676761, so the link to this post would be http://www.hiveworkshop.com/forums/showthread.php?p=676761&post=676761.