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- Nov 24, 2007
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Ah, it's been literally forever since I posted any of my works here.
So now I proudly present to you one of my latest creations:
"Dance of Deception."
This is, like much of what I write, a story that's entirely out of context and is awkwardly ripped out from somewhere in the middle of my Dawn of Life total story. That, then, means that story-telling wise there'll be many things that seem unclear presently, but that will be clear when the text is put into context, so don't you lads mind that part of it.
I hope you enjoy reading it, and I furthermore hope anyone of you might take some time off your hands to write me a short review of sorts, to point out any potential grammatical errors or otherwise statements and expressions that seem wrongly used or simply look bad.
- Thanks in advance!
So now I proudly present to you one of my latest creations:
"Dance of Deception."
This is, like much of what I write, a story that's entirely out of context and is awkwardly ripped out from somewhere in the middle of my Dawn of Life total story. That, then, means that story-telling wise there'll be many things that seem unclear presently, but that will be clear when the text is put into context, so don't you lads mind that part of it.
I hope you enjoy reading it, and I furthermore hope anyone of you might take some time off your hands to write me a short review of sorts, to point out any potential grammatical errors or otherwise statements and expressions that seem wrongly used or simply look bad.
- Thanks in advance!
Dance of Deception
A single line of soft light came flowing through the frosted window as she hesitantly pushed the silken drapery to the side. Sensibly keeping herself out of sight while peering out at the streets and house-tops, “How...?” she closed her eyes and sighed to the room.
“Ah yes, crystalline weaponry and crossbow bolts, how very clever.” A voice answered from somewhere behind her. She stiffened, her eyes fixated on the white surface of the window, there wasn’t supposed to be anyone there. When the drapery reformed and the white window fled out of sight, she came to herself and whirled around. “Joay Venié of Il’Ean, also known as Jeona of Celon, what a pleasure” Greeted the stranger. He was seated in her favourite chair in the middle of the room and as per usually he wore his very bright orange coat and that horribly pompous feathery fedora hat.
“Eccianté Coloni of Monoto de Paza, Celon. Also known as “Chance” of no-where in particular” She greeted back, in fashion.
She kept a cold fix on Chance as she graciously ambled over to a chair opposing his, while using her old technique of looking around without moving her pupils to assure herself that her agents were at hand with bolts behind small spy-holes in the walls. “The alley in Ill Enahco?” she enquired, observing the game of Don having been set on the round table in front of her.
“Poor choice of assassins, weapons of steel and better agents.” Chance replied, casually plucking a cherry from a bowl on the table, and sipping the wine he had previously poured himself and her. He then smiled and made to move one of the silver pieces on his side of the Don game. “The banquette of elegant art design in the main halls of Castelle de Cellor?” he then enquired himself, after having finished his draught of wine.
Jeona then couldn’t help herself to reveal a slight smile of her own “Admittedly, a well planned assassination. Though good agents and good bribes can save a girl from such things, with a little help of tactical sensual chatter” she replied punctuating the last three words. Then she moved one of her own white pieces in response to Chance’s former move. “In the end, people simply like me better.” She added, with a sly smile, picking up a cherry herself and toying with it in her mouth. Chance winced and answered her move in the game, and then he rose to stroll casually towards the window.
“Ah... But the docks, now that was a close call.” He said, while Jeona swallowed her cherry.
“Hm-yes, I spent quite a few Paráthi to burn those ships, and still you managed to snake your way through to the other side, I barely missed with the crossbow-bolt.” She answered, spitefully, picking up one of her pieces and knocking over Chance’s chief-piece. Having arrived at the window and pulling the drapery aside, he let in a flood of light.
“Yes, I’ve still got nightmares of that arrow scarcely hitting my ear.” He answered, turning around to reveal his half-mutilated ear. “You shall, however, by the end of this conversation, wish that you didn’t miss.” He then applied.
Grabbing another cherry Jeona whirled in her chair and regarded her nemesis “Ah yes, present business. How exactly is it that you intend to kill me, Chance?” she asked, smiling still foxily.
“By good judgement of character.” Chance replied, making a mock-bow. “In fact, I have been killing you throughout this entire conversation.” He then continued with his own expression of cunning. Jeona stirred and then shortly after she laughed.
“Empty threats, Chance. I do commend you for being so bold, however. How did you get in anyways?”
“Empty? Quite the opposite my dear Joay, it’s peculiar how deadly White Catnap powder blends so perfectly together with your pieces in the Don game, isn’t it? Well, of course you would know, as you have used it so many times on friends of mine, I believe they say it’s your favourite poison?” He said, and before Jeona could reply he continued “And it’s lovable how you are so fond of cherries, and how you love playing with them when confronting your guests. Feeling a bit shaky, no?”
Jeona sat dead still, she was indeed shaking slightly, how could this be? She thought, and then gathering her wits once more she replied “I find your assessment very unlikely, and even if it were true, how would you expect to get out of here alive?” she sneered.
“Ah yes indeed, your trustworthy crossbow agents, hidden away behind their spy-holes like cowardly moles with weapons. Little help will they do you, when their weapons have been ordered for this very special occasion, as for them not to be of steel, especially when someone intervened with the delivery, giving them tad too weak strings.” Chance sang to the sound of a multitude of snapping sounds from all around behind the walls. At that very same time Jeona fell to the ground, completely overtaken by the poison coursing through her veins. Chance strolled over to her “and to answer your former question, I got in through the front door, courtesy of your house-lady. In the end, Jeona, people simply like me better.” He whispered triumphantly, then crossing the room back to the window. He let the contents of his metal wrist-bands seep out into his palms and magically formed a round ball of steel. He yanked it right through the window and escaped into the sun-light, while an orchestra of splintering glass and snapping crossbow strings complemented his abdication.
A single line of soft light came flowing through the frosted window as she hesitantly pushed the silken drapery to the side. Sensibly keeping herself out of sight while peering out at the streets and house-tops, “How...?” she closed her eyes and sighed to the room.
“Ah yes, crystalline weaponry and crossbow bolts, how very clever.” A voice answered from somewhere behind her. She stiffened, her eyes fixated on the white surface of the window, there wasn’t supposed to be anyone there. When the drapery reformed and the white window fled out of sight, she came to herself and whirled around. “Joay Venié of Il’Ean, also known as Jeona of Celon, what a pleasure” Greeted the stranger. He was seated in her favourite chair in the middle of the room and as per usually he wore his very bright orange coat and that horribly pompous feathery fedora hat.
“Eccianté Coloni of Monoto de Paza, Celon. Also known as “Chance” of no-where in particular” She greeted back, in fashion.
She kept a cold fix on Chance as she graciously ambled over to a chair opposing his, while using her old technique of looking around without moving her pupils to assure herself that her agents were at hand with bolts behind small spy-holes in the walls. “The alley in Ill Enahco?” she enquired, observing the game of Don having been set on the round table in front of her.
“Poor choice of assassins, weapons of steel and better agents.” Chance replied, casually plucking a cherry from a bowl on the table, and sipping the wine he had previously poured himself and her. He then smiled and made to move one of the silver pieces on his side of the Don game. “The banquette of elegant art design in the main halls of Castelle de Cellor?” he then enquired himself, after having finished his draught of wine.
Jeona then couldn’t help herself to reveal a slight smile of her own “Admittedly, a well planned assassination. Though good agents and good bribes can save a girl from such things, with a little help of tactical sensual chatter” she replied punctuating the last three words. Then she moved one of her own white pieces in response to Chance’s former move. “In the end, people simply like me better.” She added, with a sly smile, picking up a cherry herself and toying with it in her mouth. Chance winced and answered her move in the game, and then he rose to stroll casually towards the window.
“Ah... But the docks, now that was a close call.” He said, while Jeona swallowed her cherry.
“Hm-yes, I spent quite a few Paráthi to burn those ships, and still you managed to snake your way through to the other side, I barely missed with the crossbow-bolt.” She answered, spitefully, picking up one of her pieces and knocking over Chance’s chief-piece. Having arrived at the window and pulling the drapery aside, he let in a flood of light.
“Yes, I’ve still got nightmares of that arrow scarcely hitting my ear.” He answered, turning around to reveal his half-mutilated ear. “You shall, however, by the end of this conversation, wish that you didn’t miss.” He then applied.
Grabbing another cherry Jeona whirled in her chair and regarded her nemesis “Ah yes, present business. How exactly is it that you intend to kill me, Chance?” she asked, smiling still foxily.
“By good judgement of character.” Chance replied, making a mock-bow. “In fact, I have been killing you throughout this entire conversation.” He then continued with his own expression of cunning. Jeona stirred and then shortly after she laughed.
“Empty threats, Chance. I do commend you for being so bold, however. How did you get in anyways?”
“Empty? Quite the opposite my dear Joay, it’s peculiar how deadly White Catnap powder blends so perfectly together with your pieces in the Don game, isn’t it? Well, of course you would know, as you have used it so many times on friends of mine, I believe they say it’s your favourite poison?” He said, and before Jeona could reply he continued “And it’s lovable how you are so fond of cherries, and how you love playing with them when confronting your guests. Feeling a bit shaky, no?”
Jeona sat dead still, she was indeed shaking slightly, how could this be? She thought, and then gathering her wits once more she replied “I find your assessment very unlikely, and even if it were true, how would you expect to get out of here alive?” she sneered.
“Ah yes indeed, your trustworthy crossbow agents, hidden away behind their spy-holes like cowardly moles with weapons. Little help will they do you, when their weapons have been ordered for this very special occasion, as for them not to be of steel, especially when someone intervened with the delivery, giving them tad too weak strings.” Chance sang to the sound of a multitude of snapping sounds from all around behind the walls. At that very same time Jeona fell to the ground, completely overtaken by the poison coursing through her veins. Chance strolled over to her “and to answer your former question, I got in through the front door, courtesy of your house-lady. In the end, Jeona, people simply like me better.” He whispered triumphantly, then crossing the room back to the window. He let the contents of his metal wrist-bands seep out into his palms and magically formed a round ball of steel. He yanked it right through the window and escaped into the sun-light, while an orchestra of splintering glass and snapping crossbow strings complemented his abdication.
