The Lesser Light

[Filmting]

Link to story on WattPad: http://www.wattpad.com/104546995-tales-of-wonder-the-lesser-light

Story:

I'm not sure where to begin. It didn't really start anywhere, its just always been like this. I guess, I can start with myself and go on from there.

I grew up not really knowing what I wanted to do. I remember mostly keeping to myself. Ever since school I knew I was different. I was always the one excluded from everything, and the last one picked. Whenever the teacher told somebody to find a group or a partner I was always left alone, so I usually had to work with the teacher or by myself.

I didn't mind any of it though. I liked being alone. It gave me time to think. While all the kids was playing outside, during recess, I sat alone inside by my self, lost in inner thought.

I wasn't really focused on my homework. It bored me mostly. I wasn't thinking, how to solve this math problem, or write this essay. I was thinking, why did I have to write this essay, why did I have to do this math? What was the point of it all?

That's a funny word - why. If you keep asking it, you always end up with the same conclusion... Inconclusive... We just don't have all the answers, giving lots of room to make them up.

And I sure did. I had an incredible imagination. I always came up with ideas for all sorts of random things. I invented games to play on paper, drew abstract doodles, or created stories on my homework that wasn't within the so called rules and the task. Yet I didn't really have any other forum for all this artistic energy within me.

It was not until later, when I grew up, that I had the means to follow my dream. I tried to become an artist. I was determined. I would be a star. One of the great! No, that's not right. One of the greatest!

I followed down this path for many years. And it was not an easy path to take. The road to sucess is filled with many challenges. But I knew, nothing worth having comes easy. I might have hit many walls on my road, and I was tempted a lot of times to turn back. To give up, and say this wasn't for me.

But I knew that nothing was impossible, if I just believed. I might have faced defeat, but one is not defeated until you stop trying to succeed. Every time I failed, it was an opportunity to learn. To develop myself, to grow and become the most talented expert of them all. And I eventually did. Though, not the kind I had hoped for.

I followed the road, until I had made perfection. That might been a bit of a bold claim, but I knew it was true. When you create perfection, you just know it. There is no question, no doubt that what you have made is truly a masterpiece. It's like solving a mathematical problem. It's just clear that you are right.

And I knew what I had made, was sublime. I questioned everything, as I had done in days past, and I always found the answer within what I have made. There was absolutely nothing wrong with it. It was the most beautiful and inspiring piece of art ever created. And I made many more like it.

Yet, I never became one of the greats. I did everything right, yet I never saw the spotlight. I never became the star that I so wanted to be. How could it be? When I looked upon what I have made I saw that it was perfection. It didn't even rival that of the best, it outshined them completely. What I made, was perfection...

What they made was, shit, to say it frankly. There were no technique, no subtext, no originality, no abstraction, no style or deep metaphors, philosophical and ethical questions that dealt with society, or anything of the sorts. None of it. It was all just some random ass, bland and flat pieces of garbage, that appeals to the dumb masses who would laugh at god damn fart jokes. By all definitions it was a disgrace!

Yet they got all the publicity, and I got none. They got all the money and fame, and were labeled "experts and artists" while I remained unknown.

I might have been jealous. True. I didn't have the same opportunities as them, and this I understood. We are not all born equal. This was the hand I was dealt, and I did my darn best to play it. It just wasn't a winning hand. And I had to accept that fact. I just couldn't compete with the resources of the rich and already famous. They stole the spotlight everyday with everything they did. No matter how small and unimportant it was.

It was like the light of the moon. A beautiful and graceful beam that reveals the true colors of perfection. Like a veil it cast over the landscapes, and filled the world with a jeweled glimmer of darkness. So beautiful. So perfect. Yet no one saw it, for it only appeared at night, when they were sleeping. All they saw was the bright and burning sun in their face.

Was it too much to ask for a little recognition?
Was it too much to ask for a little money to live?
Was it too much to ask for a little fame and glory?

I just wanted somebody to tell me what I had made was beautiful. I wanted someone to appreciate what I had created, and I mean truly and deeply appreciate and understand it, like I did. And sure, there were some. And was it not for those few, I might not have had the will to carry on. Yet the masses didn't appreciate what I did. They never even knew I existed. I was like a distant star upon the night sky. A single light upon a massive heaven, easily overlooked.

It wasn't until one day, when I took a deep look at my own art and saw a reflection of myself. I still remember to this day the emotion that I felt that night. I still remember the tears that I cried, from deep within my very soul and heart. The tears the forever changed my world, and was the reason for my perfection.

I didn't create these masterpieces for others. I made them for myself. The world didn't want this. They didn't appreciate this as I did. Only I knew what true perfection was, only I had the skill to create what I did. To hell with the world around me! I've never needed them before, why should I do so now. I've already learned all I can from them. I've gone far beyond their level. No, I didn't create for others. I created only for myself...

And to this day, I still continue to create these pieces of art. I've spent far too much time at it. It's what I know, its what I'm good at. I knew that I would never be as popular as the mainstream and famous. I knew that the world would never know my name. That I would never achieve any fame. That I was destined for this hallow place, to remain.

Yet none of it bothered me at all. For I see clearly now. To this day, I continue to create my masterpieces. I continue to create my sublime perfection. And never shall the opinions of others bring me down. Never shall the world outside have any influence. I will never compromise my ambitions to appeal to an audience. I listen now only to myself, for this is my creation, made for me, and me alone. I know better then them all.

I might be outshined, but I am not the lesser light!


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