well, i'm sorry, but i'm not really positive about it.
(maybe i'm just spoiled by other great cinematics i've seen..)
Some tips:
- music fadein/fadeout when the battle starts.
- Grammar
- reduce the obviousness in the monologs and dialogs, the text sometimes made me feel like i was watching a pre-school comicserie of some kind.
(with that i meant the parts like 'first i will have to take off my armor, and lay down my sword')
- Try to use a space, or enter after a sentence is ended. also watch the use of questionmarks, some sentences missed some.
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@ part 2:
- Who is the warden, where did she come from, why did she attack thranduil?
- Omg at the rowboat, that looks terrible, i'd advice you to change that.