I don't need to introduce myself...

[Alan Quaterman]

As I say you must be living in a cave not to know me.
If you think that I am 27 years old.
If you think I'm working for Apple.
If you think I live in London.
If you think I have a beautiful girlfriend and the old Mini Morris.
If you think I have my own house with pink front doors.
If you think I have a single Mac at home.
If you think I don't have a overpowered Varta lamp.
If you think I like guinness.
If you think I'm a game maniac.
You think right.
But...
If you think I work for MI6.
If you think I have an Aston Martin.
If you think I have more than one girl in my kingsized bed.
If you think I have more than one Mac all over the world.
If you think I have palaces all over the world.
If you think my surname is Richardson.
You think wrong and I'll have to kill you then.