[Cinematic] Arena of Enanguin - Part One

[Amigurumi]

Hello hive!

After my peasant cinematics, I'm going to do a new series.
It's called 'The Arena of Enanguin'. In this, there is a young boy, who want to fight in that arena, to get honor, and popular.
Basicly, it's going to be a fighting cinematic. Except the first part

In the first chapter, his past (from his sixth age) will be narrated.
So only some history things, which I will maybe use in later parts.

Well, tomorrow, I'm going to italy, for two weeks, so I can't work on it.
Maybe you can watch it, and write in this thread, what can be improved etc.

After I'll come back, I will read all the posts, and try to improve it.

Thank you!

 

[Septimus]

Basicly, it's going to be a fighting cinematic.

Battle cinematic require more extraordinary work than other cinematic.

Don't make it too long and repetitive or else it would be a complete kill.

 

[Amigurumi]

well, it's not a battle against one enemy. It's a battle in a arena, so every part of the cinematic series will show another fights. ( 1-3 battles/ cinematic, I think) Maybe I add a small story part add the end, but I'm not sure atm.

 

[El_Suave]

It's actually looking pretty good. The only thing I would point out is the grammar in one of the last lines. "He will explain me some new techniques." I forget the exact wording but something about that line seemed off.